Path: pubnews.netcom.net.uk!diablo.netcom.net.uk!netcom.net.uk!ldn-newsfeed.speedport.net!newsfeed.speedport.net!newsfeed.icl.net!newsfeed.skycache.com!Cidera!news-out.usenetserver.com!news-out-sjo.usenetserver.com!news.alt.net!!link.net!under.com!brisac.net.news!brisac.net!not-for-news
From: pHant <[email protected]>
Newsgroups: alt.hackers.malicious
Subject: Sn1ffed Chat Log 30
Followup-To: alt.hackers.malicious,alt.jedi-of-ro0t
Date: Fri, 02 Mar 2001 13:30:13 +1000
Organization: EHAC
Lines: 143
Message-ID: <[email protected]>
Reply-To: [email protected]
NNTP-Posting-Host: 214.33.60.9
Mime-Version: 1.0
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii
Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit
Complaints: [email protected]
X-Newsreader: Forté Agent 1.7/32.534
X-No-Archive: yes
Xref: diablo.netcom.net.uk alt.hackers.malicious:273444

M: <sobbing with death grip on poop-stick> Oh MY GOD! That IS a real
alligator!!

R: <snapping pix> Yo. Turn to da right.

B: Jes' don' feed the gator or pay it any atten-shun. Dey don' attack
peeps unless---

R: Ain't wut I hear. I dun see on da tube way dey got no fear of
peeples a'TALL!!

M: Put that CAMERA down now! HELP ME!!

B: If-inZZ joo hold on to da poop-stick and don' thrash arounZ, it
won' take no notice a joo.

<2 metres long, 350 kg female alligator approaches the MiZZ BuZZard
slowly and coyly winks at -M>

M: HELP! MAN OVERBOARD! HELP!

B: I tellZ ya, alla dat noise is gonna 'tract its atten-shun.

R: Just be cool, bro. An' turn to da right like I say.

<Alligator winks at -M again and blows bubbles in his direction>

R: WHOA! Did yoo see dat, Buzz? Da gator be sendin' a signal to Ossif
-- Marty! I dun seen all bout dis on da Learnin' Channel! Dat gator in
HEAT and she be wantin' him! <powers up notebook, clicks flower>

B: But how iZZit --

M: Gee, will you shut the fuck UP and help--WHOA!!!!

<Alligator approaches -M and rubs snout against his nose playfully.
Winks again. Blows another bubble>

R: Hatter! Yoo ain't fer REAL!

H: So it's a little early for mating season, makes no difference
really. The gator is HOT. She recognizes another limbic and puts the
moves on. Ya can't BLAME her, Riki. Or do ya wanta claim a SPANK on a
couple of reptiles, little one?

M: <sobbing, inadvertently blows bubble........ signal received by
Alligator, who roars with joyous lust> Huh-huh-help me!

B: I patcheZ dese holeZ fazt as I kin. Ah-most good as new!

<Alligator preens in the lake, circles boat to show off 1 metre tail.>

R: Yo! She showin' off her ass! Un-bleev-able!

H: Don't try to understand things that are beyond yer comprehension,
Riki. Stick to yer crackers and yer homophobia.

B: <grabs polkadotZ fishing pole> Yo! Let's reel him in! He'p me out
here, Riki!

R: <ROFL> Cain't. Ah busy talkin to Mad here.

M: RAYMOND! I have CASH in my pocket.

R: Yo! Hol' on, Mad, Ah be back.

<Alligator hisses and opens snout, fails to catch BuZZ's fishing pole.
Returns her attentions and affections to soul mate -M. Begins mating
growl>

B: Whoa! We needZ mo ROPE!

R: Yoo needs a biggah BOAT!

M: Shut up and PULL!

<After strenuous efforts, -M is pulled halfway into the MiZZ BuZZard.
The sudden unilateral weight gain causes boat to capsize>

R: Swim muthafuckas!! Don' look back!

M: <gasp> I'm tired! I need a donut! and a COKE!!!

B: The BuZZard seeZ the bank o' da lake. Ain't fur.

<Alligator playfully races -M to bank. Waits impatiently and displays
feminine charms to entice -M to the bank>

R: Yo! Da Jedi WINS! First ouuta da wat-eh!

B: Yo! The BuZZard takes second place! Where --

M: <clumsily dogpaddling last ten feet and panting from exertion> BUH!

R: Holy shit, da man be SNUH-in'!!!!

B: <laughs> ZUH! Da BuZZard gots to SNUH 'long 'wits him!

Gortician: Live and on videotape for a special limited time! Best take
advantage of my low, low price on this EX-clusive real life daytime
DRAMA!

B: Jason! Call it SAVED BY DA POOP-STICK!

R: Yo, Jason! The fuck yoo doooon' here?

G: Got myself a job with the local TV affiliate. I can run 160 nodes
remotely and STILL find a way to make a buck on the side!

B: Am-BiZZ-shus! Dat's kewl.

M: <hauls corpulent quivering mass of adipose to riverbank and faints
from exhaustion>

<Alligator peers at -M. Stands up on hind legs to display external
reproductive system. Winks again.>

B: Time for da BuZZ to blow a joi-

G: I'm in. Need a light?

R: Yo, we got ser-eees work waitin' to be done. Martin! Wake up, man!

B: GotZ to get MiZZ B outta da river aft-ah dis <inhales>

G: <inhales> Can't help ya there. I gotta make 500 bucks to buy a
copyright on my own damned pirated tunes!

M: <startles subconsciously at hearing "pirate"> Ma-Ma.

<Alligator walks on hindlegs seductively past -M. Feeling rejected,
jumps back into the river, roaring inconsolably>

<SPLASH>

R: Nev-ah no pedos, nev-ah no MALISHUSH hackin' no mo'. Y'all get yo
asses up NOW. We gots WORK to do and it gots to be dun TO-NITE!!



--

pH1